Turning Holiday Breakdowns into Breakthroughs

Turning Holiday Breakdowns into Breakthroughs by Lauren BehrmanDuring this past Halloween, I was reminded that this holiday is often a flashpoint for conflict between parents who are divorcing or have already divorced. In many of the families that I work with, there were issues around the timing and act of trick-or-treating, costumes, dinner, etc. Read More

Giving Your Children the Gift of Peace for the Holidays

Giving Your Children the Gift of Peace for the Holidays by Jeff ZimmermanThe holidays are stressful for families—and stress does not discriminate. It applies to families of all shapes and sizes including those that are intact, separated, or divorced.

For families that have the additional challenge of recent divorce or separation, the first holiday season can be very difficult to navigate—there can, and probably will be, significant differences from what the children, and their parents, are used to (especially if the holidays are not celebrated together). Read More

Co-Parent Counseling for High-Conflict Parents

Co-Parent Counseling for High-Conflict Parents by Lauren BehrmanParents experience tremendous upset during divorce, yet despite this must still parent together.

When parents truly acknowledge the potential damage that their conflict can inflict on their children, many begin to find a way to work together so they can put their kids first. Still, some parents engage in negative intimacy—while they manage to legally divorce, they have not emotionally divorced. Read More

Best Practices for Divorced Parents With College Freshmen

IBest Practices for Divorced Parents With College Freshmen by Lauren Behrmant is hard for any parent to send their children off to college for the first time. The last two years of high school are so focused on the outcome of this process, creating increasing tension and expectation.  SATs, college tours, essays and applications, and then waiting with baited breath for the colleges to send acceptances all raise the temperatures of parents and children. Read More

Prepare and Plan to Ensure that Children’s Special Events are Truly Special

Prepare and Plan to Ensure that Children’s Special Events are Truly Special by Lauren BehrmanChildren’s special events deserve to be memorable and positive. Whether it’s a graduation, confirmation, bar or bat mitzvah, recital or play, children benefit from divorced parents who plan ahead to ensure that the event—and the memory of the event—will not be spoiled by parental conflict.

Parents need to know themselves: trigger points, strengths, vulnerabilities, etc. With this knowledge, they can realistically plan for the event and avoid potential minefields. Doing so ensures that the child will not experience discomfort, witness distress, or have to navigate being “in the middle.” Read More

Amidst Divorce Conflict, Parents Can Create a Secure, Co-Parenting Attachment

Amidst Divorce Conflict, Parents Can Create a Secure, Co-Parenting Attachment by Lauren BehrmanA safe, secure co-parenting relationship is ostensibly the most important and protective gift that parents who are divorcing can provide to their children. In lieu of being consumed by the logistics of divorce, it is important for parents to develop a more secure attachment to each other in their roles as parents. Read More